more than a year older...

nothing much to say!
nothing much to remember!!

The i realise it's been over a year since i started to write whatever i feel like. As i become nostalgic today then it hit me.......
shows how much i have been occupied with him. Spend last 5 days with him. Thanks to Bandh, we did nothing expect playing with the bed; sleeping, teasing, watching movies, working, yawning, laughing, fighting, loving, shouting, regretting, kissing, cooking, eating, dish-washing, talking, walking, planning, dreaming, thinking, making, reading, writing, waiting, playing, chatting, cursing, skyping, and yada, yada.....

last 5 days says: probably we can live together without much drama. As one of my friend put it: we were practicing to learn how to live together :P

Arrival of the summer

The summer is here!

Temperature has risen above 30 for sure bringing sweats everywhere :P And I don't like the idea of travelling to hot, humid place during this time. Not that i intend to go somewhere, except probably in September. If all goes well, I might say hello España. Fingers crossed for sure!

Last week, Erik and I had our emotions full on display. In summary; we had our fight. He was just irritated at something and was snapping me on everything. I had enough of it and told flatly that probably we need to have a talk, about the unseen but growing discomfort between us. As i prepared to leave, leaving him space and time to think of what his next step would be, he asked me to stay. With sadness in his eyes, he asked for forgiveness and told one cheesy line 'When i have arguments with you and then i realize how much more i love you'. I just laughed at his silly answer yet i stayed. We talked about the issue and guess we are done for good with it. And yesterday, I accidentally read his chat with his friend where he had shared that he is quiet serious about us. I just got overwhelmed. Of course i felt bad that i read it, but i felt quiet nice to know how he feels about me.

Just hope this summer brings more happiness and solutions to our probable cause of miseries including the visa!

scary moments

There comes the moment when both of you snap at eachother. Both of you try to find the reason to build your argument often leading to cold atmosphere with volley of questions, answers, disapproval and more reasons. After a while you realize, are you playing it too strong or is it he who is playing strong. Either way two types of fear crop in your head: 1. How can i spend rest of my life with such person wondering if such situations would keep arising in future and 2. what if this argument leads to a bigger argument resulting in a chaos?

He chose the restaurant for dinner and i didn't have patient to wait for table to be free. Next restaurant same: he left saying it's full like before. Finally I chose the restaurant which was thankfully empty but then argument flared over the menu. I could sense his annoyance and i couldn't just stand there doing nothing about it. I spoke of it and we ended up discussing (not heated and loud one: it was more controlled and measured one) and evaluating whole scenario each trying to seek answer out of it. It must have been a perfect drama scene for waiter wondering what these two boys are discussing about.

Yes, dinner was little cold but at least we ate with smile! 

nothing much!

The clock is about to strike and signal beginning of new day. My heart is racing for this new day. Something big is going to happen tomorrow.. well not that big but i am excited about it anyway.

Came back from a awesome weekend outing with Erik. Every moment i spend with him makes me realise how hopeless i am becoming about him. Overall this weekend was crazy weekend. Hope such moments continue to come and surprises us everyday in good way.

New year: new hopes

New year came with new beginning. For the first time, we went out of Kathmandu (with friends of course) and had quiet good time. After unsuccessful but stressful visa attempt, we realized we needed some break and new year came as an opportunity. So we began this year by doing: rafting, roaming around the beautiful city of Pokhara and knowing each other even more!
About the visa, there are some silver lining. Hopefully we can use that opportunity and see where it takes us.

On another note, i have been buying so many books recently. I have got at least 4 and still haven't finished the old ones. I seriously need to get back to my books!

P.S. he has promised next weekend is all about us. Let's see what he cooks up. Update, for sure :-)

waiting for the silver line

Seriously frustrated, angry and dismayed at my own country.

Getting permanent visa for Erik seems to be herculean task and I have no idea how we will move forward. Student visa also looks elusive at the moment driving both of us crazy! It's fucking expensive and fucking bureaucratic. Other forms of visa are also similar. Last option i had was if there could be employment visa but seems that too is fucking not easy. If marriage was the only way to ensure his visa, I would have done it without thinking twice but sadly my own fucking country doesn't even recognize my own marriage.

Looking for that silver line in these dark clouds. Yes, it's raining like crazy here and my mind is doing same dance.

P.S. sorry for using too much of F word!

Impressing people!

Suddenly I have lost enough weight to make people stop and scream 'Oh my god, you have lost so much of weight'. I kinda noticed my loss of weight while posing for pic with Erik. I looked small in that pic. Anyways, my mission is now to eat more and get that few flab as soon as possible.

The parents are somewhere up in the Himalayas and so is he. They will come back this week and I have to show them around the city. Right now, i am trying to understand his culture and history by reading the book his parents got for me. Lesson no. 1: I shouldn't try my little Spanish with his dad but use one Basque word saying hello. I need to look at my copy to remember how its written and pronounced. As i was trying to remember how to say hello, AK reminded me that i have to get something for them which had completely missed my mind. Now i am in total loss about what should i be getting for them? Probably a shawl for mom but what for dad? I have no freaking idea. Need to ask around. If you have any suggestion, feel free to drop one :-)

If everything goes right and we feel really comfortable, i could be moving in with him before this autumn. Fingers crossed. When he told me i could move in with him, I gave him warning word saying 'be really careful of what you wish for'. hahaha i sounded so evil when i said so. But if that's likely to happen, then me coming out to my mom will happen earlier than that. Even if not permanently moving in, i will live with him for few weeks to months helping him to settle down. This will happen for sure. But everything hangs with big IF.

That's all i have for now. Excited about day after tomorrow!!!